Every January, millions of people set goals to “eat better,” “get healthier,” “lose weight,” or “start fresh.” And while a new year can indeed feel like a clean slate, many people unknowingly carry old, unhelpful vocabulary into their new habits. Words that are judgmental, moralizing, or fear-based, especially when it comes to food and weight.
These words might feel harmless. They’re often phrases we’ve heard since childhood or repeated for years without realizing the impact. But the language we use about food and bodies doesn’t just describe our experiences, it shapes them.
This year, instead of reinventing yourself, consider reinventing your vocabulary. The words you choose can help you build a more peaceful, sustainable, and empowered relationship with food and health. In this post, we’ll explore why neutral language matters, how to recognize old patterns, what vocabulary to shift toward, and practical tools for using neutral language in everyday life.
Why Language Has So Much Power Over Our Eating and Body Image
Language is more than communication, it’s a mirror of beliefs, habits, and values. For decades, nutrition conversations have used moral, binary terms such as:
- “Good foods” vs. “bad foods”
- “Cheat days”
- “Guilty pleasure”
- “I was so good today”
- “I ruined my diet”
- “I need to earn this”
- “I feel fat”
- “Goal weight”
- “Clean eating”
These phrases might sound normal, but they reinforce a cycle of shame, restriction, and all-or-nothing thinking.
1. Moralizing food intensifies guilt and binge-restrict cycles
Labeling foods as “good” or “bad” trains your brain to believe you are “good” or “bad” for eating them. It becomes personal, not nutritional, which heightens guilt and increases the likelihood of compensatory behaviors like restricting later, overeating, or “starting over Monday.”
2. Weight-based language feeds body dissatisfaction
Words like “flabby,” “gross,” or “I feel fat” attach morality and value to body size or appearance. This language nurtures body shame, sometimes beginning as early as childhood, and can prevent people from seeking healthcare, eating intuitively, or moving joyfully.
3. Language creates self-fulfilling beliefs
Saying, “I have no willpower,” “I’m addicted to sugar,” or “I can’t keep sweets in the house” shapes your expectations of yourself (often inaccurately). These narratives can block growth, discourage healing, and reinforce diet-culture myths.
4. Words influence behavior more than we realize
Studies in psychology show that the words we repeat internally shape behaviors even more strongly than external instructions. When you change the language you use, you also change your perception of choices, your emotional reactions, and your sense of control.
Shifting to neutral language isn’t about being softer; it’s about being more accurate, less judgmental, and more supportive of sustainable behavior change.
How Diet Culture Taught Us to Use Moral Language
Diet culture is deeply woven into everyday society. It shows up in media, in family dynamics, in school lunchrooms, marketing, fitness spaces, and healthcare.
Here are key ways diet culture influences vocabulary:
1. Binary thinking in dieting
Traditional dieting promotes strict rules:
✔ Allowed foods
✖ Forbidden foods
When you “break a rule,” the language around it becomes emotional, personal, and dramatic. Even though rules around food rarely have scientific grounding, we learn to attach morality to following or breaking them.
2. Marketing pushes extreme labels
Food companies and wellness influencers use words like:
- “Guilt-free”
- “Clean”
- “Detoxifying”
- “Skinny”
- “Burning fat”
These terms shape beliefs, especially for people repeatedly exposed to this messaging.
3. The fitness industry moralizes exercise
Words like “no excuses,” “beast mode,” or “earn your calories” encourage a transactional, punishing relationship with movement and one based on worthiness rather than wellbeing.
4. Family and cultural norms reinforce these messages
Many adults grew up hearing things like:
- “You don’t need seconds.”
- “Are you sure you want to eat that?”
- “You look great, you lost weight!”
- “We don’t keep junk food in this house.”
Even if well-intentioned, these comments reinforce that food has moral weight and bodies have social value based on appearance.
What Is Neutral Language?
Neutral language removes moral judgment. It describes food and bodies factually, emotionally neutrally, or with permission, instead of applying labels like good/bad, healthy/unhealthy, or skinny/fat in a value-loaded way.
Neutral language is:
- Descriptive instead of judgmental
- Flexible instead of rigid
- Inclusive instead of shame-based
- Body-neutral rather than body-critical
- Empowering rather than punitive
Examples of Neutral Food Language
| Instead of… | Try saying… |
| “I was bad, I had dessert.” | “I had dessert tonight.” |
| “This is junk food.” | “This is a higher-sugar snack.” |
| “That’s a guilty pleasure.” | “I enjoy this food.” |
| “This is clean eating.” | “This is a meal with mostly whole foods.” |
| “I can’t eat carbs.” | “I feel best when I balance my carbs with protein and fiber.” |
Examples of Neutral Body Language
| Instead of… | Try saying… |
| “I feel fat.” | “I feel uncomfortable in my body today.” |
| “I need to lose weight.” | “I want to feel more energetic/strong/mobile.” |
| “My tummy is gross.” | “My stomach is part of my body and it changes.” |
| “I hate how I look.” | “I’m working on accepting my body as it is.” |
Examples of Neutral Goal Language
| Instead of… | Try saying… |
| “I need to get skinny.” | “I want habits that support my wellbeing.” |
| “I should eat better.” | “I want to add more nourishing foods.” |
| “I have no self-control.” | “I’m learning to listen to my body.” |
How Changing Language Improves Relationship With Food and Body
You don’t need to overhaul your entire lifestyle to see benefits. Even small language shifts can result in:
1. Reduced guilt and shame around eating
When food becomes neutral, it no longer triggers internal conflict. Eating becomes something you do, not something that determines your worth.
2. Increased flexibility around food choices
Neutral language encourages curiosity rather than judgment. Instead of “I blew it,” you begin asking, “What did my body need today? What can I learn from this?”
3. More intuition around hunger and fullness cues
Restriction and moral language drown out body cues. Neutral language invites reconnection with hunger, satisfaction, and emotional needs.
4. Improved ability to form sustainable habits
Rigid, all-or-nothing thinking sabotages long-term consistency. Neutrality supports gradual, realistic changes that build lifelong skills- not short-term rules.
5. Better emotional resilience
Neutral language builds a foundation of self-compassion, which decreases bingeing, stress eating, and shame-based coping.
How to Start Shifting Your Food Vocabulary: Practical Tools
Changing language takes awareness, practice, and repetition. Here’s a step-by-step method for creating a healthier internal and external dialogue around food and weight.
1. Notice the hidden morals in your internal dialogue
Start by paying attention to the phrases you think or say automatically. You might catch yourself saying:
- “I shouldn’t eat this late.”
- “I’ve been so good today.”
- “I ruined my progress.”
- “I’ll be better tomorrow.”
These phrases signal that food decisions are being tied to personal value.
2. Ask three key questions
When you notice moral language sneaking in, pause and ask:
- Is this statement fact or judgment?
- Would I say this to a child or someone I love?
- What emotion or need is underneath this thought?
For example:
“I was bad for eating pizza.”
→ Fact or judgment? Judgment.
→ Would I say it to a child? No.
→ What emotion is underneath? Guilt, fear of losing control.
This awareness opens space for change.
3. Replace the moral word with a descriptive one
Example:
Moral sentence: “This food is unhealthy.”
Descriptive alternative: “This food is higher in sugar and lower in fiber.”
Moral sentence: “I cheated on my diet.”
Descriptive alternative: “I ate foods I don’t usually choose.”
The goal is to describe instead of judge.
4. Use language that respects body autonomy and neutrality
Try phrases like:
- “My body deserves nourishment.”
- “My appetite changes day to day.”
- “All bodies fluctuate.”
- “My weight is not my identity.”
These phrases promote acceptance, curiosity, and self-trust.
5. Practice talking about food without justification
Many people feel compelled to explain or defend their food choices:
- “I only ate this because I skipped lunch.”
- “I’m being bad today but whatever.”
- “This is my cheat meal.”
Instead, practice simple statements like:
- “I’m hungry.”
- “This looks good.”
- “This is what I wanted today.”
No justification needed.
6. Expand your vocabulary of body-neutral phrases
Instead of focusing on liking or loving your body, aim for neutrality.
Examples:
- “My body helps me live my life.”
- “My body changes, and that’s normal.”
- “I’m learning to care for my body without judgment.”
Neutrality reduces pressure and makes acceptance more achievable.
Switching Weight-Focused Language to Behavior-Focused Language
Weight is not a behavior. Yet diet culture uses weight as the central measure of health. This can sabotage realistic health changes, especially if weight fluctuates due to genetics, hormones, or life circumstances.
Behavior-focused language supports long-term wellbeing.
| Instead of… | Try… |
| “I need to lose 20 pounds.” | “I want to build habits that improve my energy and routine.” |
| “I gained weight; I failed.” | “My body changed. I’m reflecting on what support I need.” |
| “I need to be stricter.” | “I want consistent habits that feel manageable.” |
| “My weight is out of control.” | “I’m exploring what my body is communicating.” |
By shifting the focus to actions you can control, you create healthier and more empowered goals.
How to Use Neutral Language With Kids, Teens, and Families
Changing vocabulary at home can transform the way children view food and their bodies for years to come.
1. Avoid labeling foods as good or bad
Instead, refer to what foods do for the body:
- “Carbs give us energy.”
- “Protein helps our muscles grow.”
- “Fruits and veggies have vitamins.”
And also:
- “Desserts taste good and can be part of fun eating.”
2. Avoid praising kids for eating less or choosing “healthy” foods
Phrases like-
- “I’m proud of you for eating your vegetables.”
- “Wow, you skipped dessert, good job.”
-teach that food choices determine worth.
Replace with:
- “I love seeing you try new things.”
- “How does that food feel in your body?”
3. Model neutral self-talk
Kids pick up on how adults talk about their own bodies. Replace:
“I look huge in this.”
with
“I’m choosing something comfortable today.”
4. Normalize body diversity
Use phrases like:
- “Bodies come in lots of shapes and sizes.”
- “Growing bodies change.”
- “Everyone eats different amounts.”
This sets the stage for lifelong body trust.
Common Challenges and How to Overcome Them
Learning neutral language doesn’t mean ignoring health, it means removing shame so healthy choices feel more natural. Here are common struggles and how to navigate them.
Challenge 1: “If I stop labeling foods as bad, I’ll lose control.”
Actually, moral labels increase out-of-control feelings because restriction amplifies cravings.
Neutrality fosters trust and balance, not chaos.
Try:
“I can have this food anytime. It doesn’t have power over me.”
Challenge 2: “But some foods are unhealthy.”
True, some foods are more nutritious than others.
But “unhealthy” is vague, moralizing, and fear-based. Better alternatives:
- “lower in nutrients”
- “higher in sodium”
- “higher in sugar”
- “not very filling”
These descriptors help you make informed, not fearful, choices.
Challenge 3: “It feels fake to talk this way.”
Just like learning a new language, neutral language takes practice.
Start with surface-level substitutions and let your emotional relationship shift over time.
Challenge 4: “My family or coworkers still use diet language.”
You don’t have to challenge them directly. Just model neutrality.
Example:
Coworker: “I’m being so bad with this cookie!”
You: “I’m enjoying mine. It’s delicious.”
You shift the energy without correcting them.
A New Year Vocabulary List: Words to Add and Words to Retire
Words to Retire
- Good/bad
- Clean/dirty
- Guilt-free
- Cheat day
- Junk
- Fattening
- Skinny foods
- Willpower
- Off-limits
- Ruined
- Sinful
- Indulged
- Being good
- Being bad
Words to Embrace
- Satisfying
- Nourishing
- Filling
- Balanced
- Higher protein
- Higher fiber
- Higher sugar
- Energy-giving
- Enjoyable
- Comforting
- Supportive
- Neutral
- Body signals
- Adjusting
- Exploring
Making Neutral Language a Long-Term Lifestyle Habit
Here are ways to stay consistent beyond January:
1. Create a “neutral language” journal
Write down old phrases, then rewrite them using neutral wording. This builds awareness.
2. Surround yourself with neutral messaging
Seek out:
- Non-diet nutrition professionals
- Intuitive eating content
- Body neutrality accounts
- Fat-positive creators
Curate your feed intentionally.
3. Practice neutrality during meals
Check in with:
- Hunger
- Fullness
- Satisfaction
- Emotional needs
- Physical comfort
Use descriptive words to reflect your experience.
4. Celebrate non-weight wins
Examples:
- Better sleep
- More energy
- Reduced stress eating
- More food flexibility
- Improved digestion
- Consistent movement
- Fewer binge episodes
These are meaningful milestones that reinforce healthier relationships.
5. Use neutral language even on “hard” days
Especially when you feel bloated, emotional, or uncomfortable. Neutrality is most powerful when used during self-doubt.
Final Thoughts: New Year, New Vocabulary, New Relationship With Yourself
A new year doesn’t require a new you. It requires a kinder you.
A more honest you.
A more compassionate you.
Your body does not need judgment. Your food choices do not define your character. Your weight is not a measure of your worth. When you adopt neutral language, you give yourself permission to break free from guilt, shame, and black-and-white thinking around food.
Neutral language is not passive.
It is powerful.
It is intentional.
It is healing.
As you step into this year, remember:
You are not a problem to be fixed.
You are a person learning to care for yourself with more clarity, accuracy, and kindness.
And sometimes, it starts with changing even just one word.
Reach out to us if you’re searching for more support this New Year!
Resources:
ChatGPT
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/intuitive-eating
https://www.hsph.harvard.edu/nutritionsourcehttps://www.intuitiveeating.org
https://www.evelyntribole.com
https://www.ellynsatterinstitute.org
https://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org
https://www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk
https://www.healthateverysizeblog.org
https://asdah.org
